It’s been a while since I’ve blogged. I’ve been going through a reflective process and as many of you know I’ve come to the decision to move to Cali in a few months (August/Septemberish) with my brother and his best friend. As you can imagine, I’ve been going through a wide range of emotions, epecially as the time gets closer and reality sets in with job searching. The comfortableness of family and friends is hard to release-tears are sure thing.
However, if I don’t do it I’ll always wonder “What if I had gone to Cali?”. I’ve watched too many people live their life with regret and dealt with many of my own so I’m willing to take a leap! So as I plan and pray, I ask that you pray with me for direction, orchestration, and finances as I prepare for this journey.
moving to Cali April 17, 2011
Future June 13, 2010
Fear grips the one
Whose life has changed
Beyond what was dreamt
Wildest dreams
A whirlwind of possibilities
Groping in the dark
For something steady
But releases
The thing that stops movement
Perhaps groping is better than
Holding fast to a second rate desire
Separate Truths April 27, 2010
http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/articles/2010/04/25/separate_truths/?s_c
ampaign=8315
My friend Stephanie sent me this interesting article! I think the author brings up some
valid points. For example, the error in the idea that all religions point to
the same way. I think it’s alot easier to claim this so we can have “world
peace”. It’s part of the one world philosophy that I believe is part of the end
time advancement. The problem is that religion is made of people so it will
always be flawed (as you and I both know).
It’s also tough that Christianity is lumped into the group of “religions”
because we lack the power of the early church. Yet Paul had this same problem
when he did miracles. The people started trying to worship him with sacrifices
of their present day deities, saying he was a god. We as people like to join
was is familiar to us together and so we can validate whatever we want to
do…human nature. Sometimes it seems so hopeless. Yet God obviously thought
that despite human error it would be worth it to send Jesus to help us out!
Good thing.
I love the point that the author brings up about salvation being the goal of
mainly Christianity…however, was Jesus’ idea of “salvation” more than just
heaven….I think so…isn’t that supposed to bring harmony, health, victory
over death, disease….isn’t that what everyone wants…the reversal of the
curse? I think that the other religions try to achieve this in different ways
without naming it “salvation”.
This article is full of good points….I could go on forever…
I would luv to know your thoughts!!!
Christmas December 15, 2009
Christmas
The time has finally come
Oh this thrilling time of year
Where families finally gather together
Where hearts are joined as one
_________________________
To remember the spirit of love
As deep as the ocean
To believe in the power of joy
As tall as the highest mountain
_________________________
The time has finally come
Oh this thrilling time of year
Where shopping for the perfect gift
Becomes a chore for some
____________________________
But remember the spirit of peace
That holds you in its arms
Remember the comfort of salvation
That lifts you high to the Son
________________________
Let’s not forget the lonely souls
That wait on the corner street
Or walk past the sorrow of a child
Who longs for hope to meet
________________________
The time has finally come
Oh this thrilling time of year
Take hold of this moment
And to your heart hold it dear
discerning November 14, 2009
As I looking back through my own church history, I recognize that I experienced many positive things as well. I was taught the word of God from a young age on, I was in fellowship with many strong believers to support my faith, I learned to participate in the prophetic, I learned how to lead God’s people in worship. I know that I gained a lot from “the church”.
At the same time, I am wondering if the negative I experienced was due to the structure of the church. Not that there won’t always be sin but I wonder if our “Westernized” church services perpetuated problems from well meaning people.
It’s not that I’m being critical; it’s that I’m discerning what I see. I am talking about things I have observed, not things I have found by looking for faults. Certainly, throughout these 26 years I haven’t changed my actions though I discerned much negative….I have served faithfully and with a good attitude.
So now as I step back, I am observing and analyzing things and wondering what the outcome will be. I cannot make any decisions or judgments necessarily; I can only speak from what I have discerned. So forgive me if I sound critical…that’s not my heart…I’m just observing and analyzing right now. And I feel that we all should be discerning things because it’s mindless faith that sometimes causes error. My searching continues….
November 8, 2009
So as I continue in my search for the truth about “church”, I’ve been asking lots of questions but am unable to come up with any concrete answers quite yet. In my studies of the history of the church, I have found that all of the following common church practices are derived from pagan culture:
- An orderly service (worship, sermon, altar call, etc)
- The sermon
- The church building (including chairs, pulpits, etc)
- A paid pastor who is a “professional”
- Hierarchical leadership
- Dressing up for church
- Choirs
- Worship team/worship leaders
- Tithing and clergy salaries
- Ushers
- Baptism separated from conversion
- The sinner’s prayer
- A ritualistic communion
- Bible college/seminary
- Sunday school
- Youth/children’s pastors
If you take those away, what are you left with? People. That’s the only conclusion I’ve made-that church is people. So knowing the roots of the church and how different it is from the early church, I am asking “what do I do now?” What does God want for his church?
wrestling with what I believe October 14, 2009
I currently don’t belong to any organized religious group and it’s been an interesting journey. The first day or two I felt like I was in a daze as if I had no bearings and i didn’t know where I was going but the next few days and even now I feel such a release.
I’m trying to figure out what brings this release….I’ve been in church my entire 26 years so you take away what’s comfortable and whoa I find out what I really believe.
So I’ve been searching and thinking about things in a non-churchy way and find it very freeing. Not that my faith has changed…in fact I feel more sure of my faith than before….it’s just the way way I practice has changed.
I have been examining the early church and various ideas on the purpose of the church.
I found some interesting quotes in a book named Blue Like Jazz:
“If you believe something, passionately, people will follow you. People hardly care what you believe, as long as you believe something. If you are passionate about something, people will follow you because they think you know soemthig they don’t, some clue to the meaning of the universe. Passion is tricky, though, because it can point to nothing as easily as it points to something.”
This quote brings up so many thoughts in my head…what do u think?
hope September 13, 2009
We are each in a war….a fight to keep hope alive in our hearts. A fight to hope for the things we desire. I have seen some many people lose hope and then lose their passion for living. As I write this, I’m struggling to hope for what I’ve been dreaming of. Is is because I’m tired (maybe) or is it because I’m afraid to hope for fear of being disappointed or is it because I don’t believe in myself? Whatever the reason, I will not give up the fight! Even David had to tell himself to hope again in Psalms 42 he says “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And [why] are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him [For] the help of His countenance.” So tonight that is my cry but I tell my soul to hope in God! I will win the fight!
love August 8, 2009
what does God require June 29, 2009
He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8
For a large portion of the Old Testament God cries out to his people to turn back to him and to follow his laws. Although we are under a new covenant we still have commands that God has placed before us….to love God with all of our heart, mind and soul….to love our neighbors as ourselves. So that includes doing good such as what Micah declares.
- “to do justly” =to do what is right. What would be “right”? To be free from sin yes, but also to walk in love with those around us. So not just to restrain ourselves from evil but to do good.
- “to love mercy” That sounds so poetic but actually is alot more difficult! Do I love what is good? Do I pity those in need? Do I have a heart for others or am I seeking my own benefit? Do I enjoy evil on TV? Where is my heart in this?
- “to walk humbly with thy God” Do I lead a life of humilty (meekness, free from pride or arrogance)? Am I too focused on myself that I miss those around me? Do we care about the things that others care about? Am I walking on my own or am I actually “with God”?
I guess we are all wrestling with these things. That’s why Paul talks about the flesh warring with the spirit. So God open our eyes to those around us. That we would look beyond our own interests and seek the interests of others….for then that is the commandment to love one another as we love ourself.
